Last Day of November

Well, Today is the last day of November with 10 mins left.
This month I just want to say I am thankful.
My Thanksgiving I didnt spend with my family.
I did however spend it with Ta-kitty.
God made it all possible.
We didn't have anyone else  but we had each other.
And Black friday this was the 1st time i actually worked on that day.
But other than Than Spending our anniversary together I promise to make up
for what has happened this year.
I pray for Guidance because I am only Human.
I make mistakes, everyone does.
Even after I still own up to it you know and I feel relieved.
Thank you lord for creating me and thank you for allowing to have a girlfriend who actually cares about me.
who wont leave or call me a piece of crap. Some one who will actually return my feelings.
I Love Ta- Kitty :)
And this wasnt all possible if it werent for you Lord.
Thank you

3 questions

What does it take for a person to care about someone other than themselves?
Living Life freely without pain or suffering/ Is it just a dream?
People treating others with respect. Is it a crime to change?

What is going thru my head pt 8

At times I feel like i have lost a part of me.
Music, games,and card games, what does it mean?
These things  I used to do. Where did it go?
I can only answer that myself, no one knows.
When it comes music, there's hip-hop and rock.
Think of trek, I wish i were Spock.
Reading helps me think of new things to write.
I would talk to a person instead of wanting a fight.
I am Jynex, I am not the best or better than rest.
Always wondering on what to do next.
Living Life one day at a time.
People look at me strange. Why?
What's the problem.
Am I am snob ? No

I'm better off leaving that for the people that are stuck up.
For them I would tell them to Shut the Hell up.
You are a human being.
No one is perfect what are you seeing.
I see that the person that can help others.
Like a son giving food to his mother.
Here is where i finish this.
Striving for a better tomorrow, instead of being selfish. 

Rose

Roses are red, yet they have so many thorns.
Scraping my shirt that I have previously worn.
Should I leave it where it is or should i look else where.
When the rose pricks you, it doesn't care.
It doesn't have  eyes so it can't see.
It doesn't have a mouth so it cant speak.
A rose is valued more when its admired from afar.
When touched, it leaves a scar.

What theHell? An everyday Scenario

How I feel right now is hard to describe.
I feel i just got stabbed with a knife.
Just because I wasn't able to do what i said i was going to do.
You get mad at me and tell me off.
What the Hell?
What gives you the right to be mad at someone.
Getting mad at something that doesn't go your way.
Taking it out on the wrong person.
Someone that is there for you.
As I recall I never said no.
But if you actual listen not everything is suppose the way you wanted to go.
No one has their way in this world.
If you are miserable, so is the next person.
The next choice is up to you. Think carefully.
Think on how are you going to solve the problem.
It will come to you in due time.
But for now, just take a deep breath and cool down.

My thoughts on 2010....

It has been tough year for me and i am grateful that i was able to get through it.
Looking back on this year it has been more negative and it seem like all hope was lost.
Dealing with my own personal issues like my family, not being able to fine work, and my relationship.
Thought swirl in mind questioning my own existence and why I did certain things back then.
I am very sorry for everything I have done not just this year but everything in general.
Had some trying time dealing with my past and i can it wasnt easy at all. I been reflecting
on the decision I have had made 2yrs back in 2008. But i can safely now I can put that rest now.
For the lord has blessed me with a new job. I am very thankful for that.
I want to apologize for all of the struggle that has happened.
Tara's Birthday and My Birthday I want to make up for what has happened Lord willing.
I have come back to Arsenio's house. Joe's lil bro Zach thinks I am Good teacher.
Reading that letter almost made me cry.
I dont know whats going on with my brothers. I do think about that and what they are doing.
I know Tyler wonders if i will ever come back ?
For now I just have to have faith in the Lord.

A poem, Man i need to write more :)

I feel like I'm Good person, yet I'm treated like crap.
Endless taunts and gestures make you want to snap.
Act quickly Defend yourself from the attack.
Attack back with actual facts.
Do these people know me ?  No
DO they control where I go?
What gives them the right to say that you 're useless.
I am doing what I  can, stop making excuses.
Going to school, Going to work.
Its good to have options first.
Leave all distractions at home.
They are like the wind, they come and go.
Keep going and dont listen to the negative.
That is why there is the positive
To keep your spirits up when hope seems to fade.
The devil has lost this is not his day.
Give God thanks for the blessing he has bestowed upon you.
That is why He loves to see something good.
For the people that read this.
People sometime lose direction and they miss.

But when you have faith, you can go forward.

How we met pt 2

As I was telling her my version of the game.
Some of our interest were in fact the same.
She did laugh and so did I.
I felt like i was in sky.
I felt i could talk to her about anything.
Anything that was personal, I could tell her and she listen.
She understood and told me I was good person.
That made me understand why I wont leave her side.
There is no one like her i could have met at that time.
I dreamed of where she lived  A nice house maybe ?
Who knows
But I would to go there one day.
There is a time a place for everything.
On April 3rd there was no going back for me.
I made a choice and I believe
When Hugged her in the Hall of the CCB.
I told her " I wish time could stop so we could like this forever"
I admitted my feelings for her and Love her dearly.
Spending time on the 11 floor,
or
Light saber dueling in the store.
Spending  a birthday blasting the hell out machines.
Or Being James and Amy Killing zombies.
We had fun and we still do
These memories are but some that i have revealed.
Until next time this Love story will continue.

How we met pt 1

That day when I first met you
I thought who is she and what is her name.
Does she like music or video games.
Who knows i feel this warm feeling in my heart.
I want to know her and i will go so far.
To know her name is Tara, my mouth begins to smile.
To be this close and comfortable, its been a while.
She smiles and begins to makes jokes.
I feel ticklish when she starts to poke.
Playing some Pokemon with a friend.
She acts a cheerleader and roots for him.
Looking as they day goes by he didn't want her to leave.
Hopefully, he could catch her same time next week.
As next week came, He waited for her.
As time went by, He looked around and wonder?
Will I ever see her again ? will that be the only time?
I looked for her a month, the sun didn't shine.
Until one march afternoon  I wander into the cafe.
I look around and see her with taco bell on her tray.
Happy as I felt on the inside.
When she went for the bus, I ran outside.
I ask her phone number, hoping I can speak to her again.
That night i wasted no time in leaving her a message.
She surprise me and she called back.
That night was a night I wont forget.
Talking about gay Gary is following you in around.
Wha's next I will continue with the next part of this lovely story.
But for right now, I have to hurry and Tell her how much I love her.

Patience- the Last Poem for 0c+o83r. :)

Patience, To be able to wait without complain,
Waiting for that one day that isn't the same.
Walking back and forth, day by day.
Still trying to forgive myself from 2yrs ago last May.
2010, This year I had have losses and the same time,
I have gained much.
It was a long ten months, and it wasn't luck.
To make efforts to resolve that long list.
It will put an end to grudges that still exist.
God is there watching over me, still give me strength to continue.
Instead of reckless, take a step a back and review.
Like an essay, we see our grammar mistakes.
A simple prayer from your heart is all that takes.
"God, hear me now I am conflicted and confused.
All I see is betrayal and the fact I was used.
I ask you to give me protection against the enemy. 
I only human and I make mistakes, forgive me.
Forgive the people who have wronged me,
Your presence is near
I feel like there's hope and no reason to fear.
When I'm upset, you take away my pain.
With you Lord,I don't lose, I gain."
Thank you for my friends that show support.
Thank you for Tara, she is more than a reward.
Watch over us and keep us safe.
In Jesus name I pray
Amen

Looking Back

It's just two years has passed since reality hit me in the face.
Looking back at it now, that's a between a rock and a hard place.
2008, is when I really should have been listening.
2009, is  when i had found someone who was shining.
My life as well as other who can relate, have had issues.
Friends, family, and the girl friend who didnt work out
and  is now using up all the tissues.
We say this, "There is no point, I'm done"
Done with what?  When life has yet to begin.
We all have done bad thing in life.
I think the hardest thing to in to tell the truth and do the right thing.
Getting into trouble is easier, but getting out is harder.
Why should i let this raining day get to me.
When I'm with Sonata, the sun is always shining.
The year is almost over, not going to give up.
Damn i wondered who won the world cup.
Laughing at people saying deez nuts.
Just have to keep believing in him.
Faith and prayer
God and a brown eyed kitty
I wont feel like a failure.
I will  stand tall and win.

A poem for October 14

Clouds fill the sky,the rain falls to the ground.
It gives off a pleasant sound.
I wander around, looking confused.
I feel out of place and thinking, what to do?
At times, I feel like nothing is ever there.
The ways things are now, do people even care?
Walking and staying each and every day.
It makes me sad, so I begin to pray.
I ask the lord to help me with  my issues.
The wind blows hard, I need a tissue.
When I pray to him, My mind become clear.
No more pain or distraction, It feel likes a new year.
To start over and know who is a friend.
That person you will stand there with until the end.

The feeling worth fighting for....

Humans start out with one life.
This life can be with or without strife.
It will be a struggle to survive.
You only can experience that through your own eyes.
The influence to destroy is common.
The influence to create is rare.
The people who don't want to change always feel solemn.
The people who do believe in themselves, seem to care.
Why is it so hard to find a good person in this world?
Why is a female called a bitch instead of a girl?
The ignorant believe that they are always right.
They pick on others that aren't willing to fight.
Humans give up easily when something doesn't work out.
Instead of resolving peacefully, they rather fight and shout.
One day I pray that God will put an end to the world's problem.
Instead of seeing a difference in one another, Help out each other.
When that day comes it will be a sunny day and people will smile.
Instead of conflict we will have peace that will last a while.

Life means to me.....

What does life mean to you?
To me it means to live each day as like it's your last.
As times moves forward, I remember the past.
I kneel down and pray.
Lord, please give me the words I need to say.
To all those people near and far.
There is no need to be in the dark.
Light shines and hope is restored.
You and your children do not have to be afraid any more.
 God has come to your aid.
Even in hard times there is always one sunny day.
No clouds in the sky, my mind is clear.
So far I am blessed to see another year.

My Tribute to 9/11

Today is an important day for America. A day to remember what has happened and the losses that people suffered. A  soul of human being cannot be copied and when life ends it saddens the family and friends of that person. People take life for granted, assuming that at end the of the day, everything will be OK. Unfortunately tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone. God exist and he exists  to give us strength, wisdom, and guidance through these tough times. Today it seems like people lose the friends and family members to disagreements, separation, and death. Would it make more sense to avoid that?  It would be but sadly, life doesn’t work like that.  Being alone and no one there to help, lowers the person spirit more because he/she feels like nothing can be done. Giving up isn’t an option but people do that. They fall and they feels as they can’t get back up. We do fall to the ground but we can always get back up. Faith in yourself and in God is the key. Don’t neglect the people who care about you and  for the people that don’t, let them be. If there are  past grudges, resolve them,  if you think it’s worth the time .  Be yourself and do not pass judgment because your are the same as everyone else.
Today is Sept 11, 2010 and it is day that shall not be forgotten. Don’t only think of yourself, involve others in your life because once that person is gone, There is nothing you can do about it. It will hurt for some time but accepting the loss takes a lot of effort. In the end, You do matter. Listening to the ignorant makes you ignorant ,but ignoring them shows you care about yourself and others.

A lil story

Losing something you once had can be hard to bear.
In your time of need, there is someone that cares.
Keep yourself under control.
Let the stress take over and you will fold.
People who seem to care take more than give.
Even if you have nothing, There is still a reason to live.
What that reason is, I do not know.
Wait Patient until the show.
It will reveal itself when you reach a certain point.
you may feel relieved like a stiff joint.
Am I a poet or am i a lazy bum.
I dont why you're looking at me chewing gum.
What have i done to make you feel like this.
People have taken parts of that i miss.
I will go and reclaim what i once lost.
Something that overlooked and not sought.
Me being able to smile again.
Like how i was wen we first began.
The Squirrel who met the cat.
Looking up, I will never forget that.
What it means to smile.
It's something I haven't done in a while.
Feeling confident, the wind gives of a nice breeze.
A clear mind, my body is at ease.
Finding a purpose, what to do next,
Why do people wonder why I call myself Jynex.
A name that symbolizes who I am.
Just a simply ordinary black man.

I dont know what goes on in my head

Everyone is around in this field.

The bond we have, doesnt seem to yield.

God is my sword and my shield.

He is like a good person providing a meal

Strength and Courage go along way.

People always complain and say.

Why are bad things happening  this day.

When you do something wrong, in the end you have to pay.

God is good and great .

He is the one responsible for everything that is made.

With faith in him, You will never feel fear.

It Hurts

    What is the point of my existence?
Did I come to ruin people lives , push them away, say hurtful things.
Does  is make sense for me to be here.
God I ask you this. Why do I say hurtful thing to people.
Do I have too much pride? Do I have a hard time let things go.
Me in their lives You in mine.
I don’t know what to do right now,
All there is left  is ………..
Alone in this Hell
The Devil constantly Laughing at me.
Telling me that I am worthless.
I keep failing and making constant mistakes
I am not sure of who I am any more
All there is left is …………
Given the day where I get down on my knees
I beg forgiveness
Where are the people that care?
Did I abandon them all?
Damn It, It hurts
Fading away into shadow until I am longer seen
Lost in the Darkness of that  pit I am confined to.

A Good Point

"If two people share very different views, it's better they go their separate ways."

 Red Hair Shanks

What goes on In my Head 8

Trying to put together a poem that rhymes.

I dont realize it half the time.

The things that comes out of my big mouth.

Like Suffering from a drought.

I feel like cold with no one there.

Don't even think people even care.

But there's always one that does.

Your not alone, He's watching from above

A still mind, is it hard to obtain ?

Looking at present what have i gained?

The world and the places i have gone to.

I look around, just searching for you.

But it seems I cannot find what i have lost.

That one special item that cannot be bought.

A heart with feelings of love and care.

Proving that the love is there.

Showing what it means to be human.

That enternal commitment to a woman.

A vow you can't take back.

Cross the line and end up with a smack.

For ground I walk on is still and firm.

To show forth what i have learned.

My words are for the one that i care about.

I will go to her and tell with a shout.

I LOVE YOU